Showing posts with label hooha. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hooha. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Jayne Poses a Fine Question About Playing with Dick


Sometimes a reader of the blog stimulates (look out several puns coming <--even there, oops) an idea and Jayne's yesterday in a comment made me think.


Her question in essence was, "If a guy who drinks too much gets 'whiskey dick' what do you call the vagina of women who drinks too much before sex"? There was an RA at the dorm freshman year that had a sign on her door that said, "Alcohol: Increases desire, decreases performance". Let's just say we later found that sign to be more of an advertisement than some admonition against binge drinking. Just. saying.


Jayne further said and I agree that slut, whore, tramp all the other inappropriate double standard type names don't work at all.


So, I've been hard at it pondering the question......and well, not much has firmed up yet and I guess you could say that I might be concerned that I'm drilling in a dry well.


My first thought was of the dead fish f$ck but you know some chicks are that way regardless if they have had a sip of Boone's Farm or not so I had to rule that out.....besides.......we'd like to focus on the vagina here not the whole body.


So, obviously dulling the senses means more difficulty reaching orgasm, dehydration means less lubrication....which means pain....which mean inflammation and possibly swelling. Bulbous Vagina. Okay, Dr. Drew Pinskey I'm not.....I don't know why I even went here but I'm gonna say too late now. Jayne, would you please jump in and save me? Sinic, you probably have lots of experience....what do you think?


Jayne......very good question.


I think staying with alcohol influenced names is important so if a guy has Whiskey Dick then a chica might have........


1. Vodka Vajayjay

2. Pomegranate P$ssy

3. Beefeater Beaver

4. Kamikaze Coochie

5. Happy Hour(s) Hooha

6. Send me your own (better) idea but nothing with the "C" word......... even Jocoeveryman has some limits to what he'll post.


So, it might go something like this:


Chica 1: "Oh my God, I've had like 10 Sugar Free Red Bull and Vodkas tonight. (Feeling tummy in effort to convince herself muffin top isn't noticeable) Did you notice Jocoeveryman is looking pretty hot tonight? (hiccup)"


Chica 2: "(Wagging finger in Chica 1's face) Girl, I know you've had at least 10 SFRBV's if you think Jocoeveryman is looking good."


Chica 1: "Stop it. Stop it. (snorting) At least he is trying tonight. He has on a clean shirt.....it is cute, plus he bought me all 10 of these."


Chica 2: "(Snapping a Z) JOCO Bitch, This is a Char. ity. E. Vent. Drinks are free tonight.....I don't know why he keeps saying, 'drinks are on me'.


Chica 1: "Okay, get me outta here. Srsly. You are right. I'll hate myself besides with all this booze I have major Vodka Vajayjay"


Chica 2: "Good girl knowing you have the Kamikaze Coochie. You drive. Let's go to Taco Bell, purge, then go to my BF's hot tub"




I'm sure you chicks have already given it a moniker. Well, expanding on yesterday's theme a couple drinks will help but 10+ will not.


Enjoy and thanks for reading.