Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Tony Rizzo gets Master of the Obvious Award for 2009




Well, it is only January but I have to give out my "Master of the Obvious" award for 2009. It is already locked up folks so you can stop sending applications. Tony Rizzo of the Kansas City Star is writing a 3 part series on the murderers concentrated in zip code 64130. I can see it now. Like the opposite of Beverly Hills 90210 you'll have KC 64130.....or something better than that.


On one hand I'm sure many in the blogosphere are thrilled that somebody, anybody is finally paying attention to Kansas City's skyrocketing murder rate so I hate to pound on him too hard but the fact that our crime in concentrated in this specific zip code is as easy to figure out as a M&M estimation jar for a average 3rd grader or as easy to determine as the number of calories in a 100 calorie snack pack. So bringing attention to our murder problem....good. Tony Rizzo's 3 part series.......incredibly obvious. The East side is dangerous.

By the way, I haven't seen part 3 yet but let me also clue you in as to why nobody with any power cares about the skyrocketing, record setting murder rate in KC.....because they mostly all occur in the 64130 or nearby zip. I know most of you in JOCO never find yourself down that way. Most of my friends tell me even using it to cut into the city via 71 Highway is stupid. My work takes me in the war zone on a pretty regular basis so I'm more familiar than most JOCO'ers. Thank God we now have reciprocal conceal carry and a practically disposable Jennings 9. Let's just say I never go alone. You go to a war zone and you should expect war. Sad.

It took a crack researcher like me about 23 seconds to pull this little map from which you can make yourself for lots of different crimes. This one is just shootings for all of 2008....... Do it yourself. It is sad but fun. Try my other pet
crime problem.....domestic violence...the most under reported crime I've ever seen unless some ends up dead.





But back to Mr. Rizzo. Thanks for pointing it out. Most of us could have never figured out that little gem of journalistic research. So in the same line of "Master of the Obvious" thinking here are a few more story ideas for Tony Rizzo:




1. The best schools in KC area are in the south suburbs......oh...specifically Blue Valley.




2. Sprint is not the employer of choice these days.




3. It is cold in January in the Kansas City area.




4. SUV's get poor gas mileage.




5. Prediction: Barack Obama will be our first black (er half white...whatever) President.




6. Prostitutes advertise their services on Craiglist.....and the police like to place fake prostitute ads on Craigslist to catch people looking for real prostitutes. Okay, maybe not everyone knows that one. Take note you cheap, gross, horny bastards....now you know.




7. Your 401K is taking a beating right now due to the poor economy.






Did I miss any? That's it....be careful out there today.

11 comments:

I Travel for JOOLS said...

Did you know JoCo Sheriff has a crime map too ... well they do.

http://www.jocosheriff.org/cmap/

You can click on each one to get more specifics.

I don't like the trend.

JOCO SOB said...

When did Tony move to SOJOCO?

Anonymous said...

Screw you, shithead. Tony did a helluva job, and you are a punk

JOCOeveryman said...

Ah, now that isn't nice....I'm a shithead punk. Now did that make you feel better?

Anonymous said...

Somebody needs a hug I think.

Anonymous said...

Actually, somebody needs an old fashioned ass whooping

Kansas Sity Sinic said...

I really liked your post, JE...even if it did come a day after mine :-)

Bill the Painter said...

With all the cuts at the local paper, it's a wonder they even HAVE local reporters!

JOCOeveryman said...

Well Sinic, I wrote it the day before and didn't post it and thank you. You should be flattered that you have a mind like mine.....you are jocoeverywoman.....ha ha ha.

Anonymous said...

jocoman are you saying you own a gun and conceal carry?

JOCOeveryman said...

Conceal carry laws are reciprocal between KS and MO.