Friday, February 12, 2010

Swamp Ass

I have a bad case of swamp ass. I can't figure out where it came from. I was a good boy this week. No late night whoring or drinking. Just being a good family man, eating right, working out.

My ass is stinky. I'm farting out some rid-goddamn-diculous stuff. Srsly. This is plain stone cold gross.

I gave my wife a dutch oven this morning and JUST ABOUT KILLED HER. Her eyes legitimately watered.

Why does my ass smell like rotten eggs and sulfur? Why am I shitting like a goose?

My body is in complete revolt.......just in time for Valentine's day, right?


Anonymous said...

Are you nervous about something? That always makes mine extra aromatic...butt
Nothing says Happy Valentine's Day any better a bottle of Beano.
Good luck in the LOVE dept this weekend.
Jy in WI
PS-my 9 yr old wants to know if that is really you JE? He's calling you the "Flame Thrower"
PSS-I think what you've got going on could be considered a Winter Olympic event! ?

JOCOeveryman said...

no, not really. Good luck on your love action too.

Tell 9 yr old.....that isn't me and if it was an olympic event wouldn't it melt all the snow??